Alhamdulillah..tonight Allah gave me an inspiration,yet again,for me to write in my blog..it never cease to amaze me however, that I always seem to be inspired when im about to sleep!afraid that I would forget it in the morning I typed bout it in d notes apps in my android.wonder why I didnt get any when I was sitting in front of my lappy surfing the internet.. =.=" as a result,i slept in late evntho im sleepy..
but alhamdulillah,as im able to share evn a bit of knwledge,im more thn happy to do so.n alhamdulillah,at last im able to share bout d cnference dat I attended last weekend.the cnference masyaAllah! subhanaAllah! superbly amazing! n it was truly regretful that many ppl couldnt come..seriously..if u understand how superb it was u'll be like,"ya Allah!why didnt attend?!why didnt I buy d ticket?!why I didnt knw bout this???!!"wahahaha.(credit to my cousin for acknowledging my high spirit.. ;p)
the speakers n d entertainers were wonderful!may Allah bless them in whatever that they do..amin..not one sheikh fail to make me cry..subhanaAllah..their words touched my heart..truly..i am grateful to Allah that I made the choice to go..i am evn grateful to Him that He gives us the opportunity to choose..im grateful that I heard all those talk..im grateful that all those sheikhs words touched my heart..
im grateful that one of them remind us that as we leave d hall,that plce,that cnference,he wants us to chnge at least one thing..one thing!one thing that I knw I must chnge..n I knw if I didnt chnge that one thing,i will regret it for the rest of myself!n I will forever be in the wrath of Allah..the thought of Allah being angry with me..the thought of being thrown into d Hellfire..d thought of unable to advance myself forward as an abid n a daie..d thought of the angels hate me..all these scares d heavens out of me!
after the first day of d cnference I hesitated,evntho I knw I must do it..after the scnd day of d cnfernce I suspected that my mind purposely forgot bout it..but after the third day,i knw if I dnt do it now,i will never be able to do it ever..and d first step is hard I tell u..it is alwaaaayyyss hard..with d lafaz of bismillahirrahmanirrahim,i took it..d first step..n alhamdulillah!d response was positive!
to be d slave of Allah is what I want n when I cn beat the syaitan evrytime I made d right choices,i am soo grateful that no words cn express it..i cn only thank Him for making me strong in taking that first step..
it is never easy to let go of ur jahiliyyah..never..coz it had bcome ur flesh n blood for God knows how many years..n to leave that jahiliyyah forever?it probably felt like taking oxygen away from u..well I dnt knw bout u guys but it kinda felt like dat to me..like I was on edge if its taken away from me..
changing is never easy..its devastating..i dont want to become a slave to my desires..nor to this world..it is for Him I do this..for Him n His sake alone..i seek to please Him..may Allah make me strong in my decision n may evry single thing that I do is sincerely for His sake alone..amin..
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